In the following thread, I, who has a vast amount of experience as a guy, and then had a sex change operation and got a vast amount of experience as a girl, and then had another sex change operation cause I liked being a guy better, presents the most efficient ways to get somebody, of the opposite sex, to mess with you.

NB.
The info in this thread will not work for you if:
You are a hunchback (a little stooped shouldered is Ok)
You are ugly as sin (slightly repulsive can still work))
You chew tobacco (you're gonna die alone)
You have delusions of gender (AC/DC might work)
You look like a beached aquatic mammal (some big people are cuddly)
You are dumb as a rock (slow learner - Ok)
You think farting is funny (I think farting is funny)
You are a priest (nun means none, sorry)


P.S.
Here's a zinger for you. A guy's best source of information on meeting girls and getting dates - is his mom. She's a girl and knows how girls want to be met, treated, messed with, etc. - and - she's the only girl you're ever going to know who'll tell you the truth - unslanted towards a personal agenda - about anything.

On the other hand, a girl's worst source of information on meeting guys and getting dates - is her dad. Common sense - cause dad don't want no guys sniffing around his baby.

SOMETHING GUYS SHOULD KNOW ABOUT WOMEN

In the beginning, God created Adam and placed him in the Garden of Eden where Adam lived a wonderful, happy, fulfilled life. God, who obviously is a woman, since no man would have invented circumcision, became agitated at seeing Adam so happy so she created Eve and said, "Eve, go down there and stir up some s#!t." Now, Eve, being freshly created and having no idea how to go about stirring up s#!t, asked, "How, exactly, do I do that?" And God, who is no stranger to stirring up s#!t herself, answered, "Just be yourself." So, Eve went down to the Garden of Eden where, much to the dismay of Adam and all his descendants, she, and all her descendants, have been stirring their little brains out ever since. Not deliberately, of course - just "being themselves."

Although the story, above, is fiction, the female propensity for stirring is not. The woman's instinct to keep the air redolent with the smell of s#!t comes not from a vengeful, manhating, penis envying or lesbian Godest, but from the fact that they're smaller than men, have less effect on their physical environment and get pushed around all their lives. It's their way of saying, "I Exist!" It's the female version of Cogito Ergo Sum - "I stir s#!t, therefore I am." A strong man can move mountains, shape history and rule worlds.... But, unfortunately, man's majestic accomplishments often collapse under the weight of the unbelievable amount of s#!t a tiny little woman can stir up.  A good example of this was the mighty Samson..... and little, friggin, Delilah.

Understanding the s#!t stirring instinct, and other bizarre female behavior, requires understanding how smaller organisms use rationalization to, figuratively, level the playing field in order to compete with larger organisms - in this case, small women belittling large men in an attempt to create an imagined equality between the sexes. The small female's most obvious effort to affect the above is to corrupt the large male's basic attitudes and needs by attaching nonsensical values to his actions and motivations. So adept is the female at stirring up s#!t, she can, in this case, stir where no actual s#!t exists.

The female's most effective attack on the larger male, is to denigrate the male attribute which she covets the most, his penis. By attaching frivolous relevance to that most envied object, she attempts to deny the male at least one of his symbols of dominance. Creating such myths as: "Men like guns because guns remind them of their penis" is one such attempt to ridicule men's values, thus, leveling the field. Women tend to think this is very effective.... although, in truth, it is abhorrent, to say the least, for men to discharge, or even imagine discharging, large caliber weapons, especially those with substantial muzzle blasts, in even the general area of what women, secretly, consider a magnificent organ.

So, the bottom line is, the next time you take a date to your favorite biker bar and she starts getting that glazed look on her face...... you better get the hell outa there before she starts to stir.

Girls are weird but once you know what they want you can talk them into anything.

Wouldn't it be something if all women thought you were as great as your mom thinks you are.  I mean, mom thinks you're the greatest thing in the world. Like when you're going out and mom says, "Oh, you look so handsome." Or when she's telling all her friends what a nice boy you are - all your wonderful qualities - You know, stuff like that.

Well, consider this: Generally, moms try to raise their sons to have the qualities that they admire in a man. Moms are women just like other women and most women admire the same qualities in a man. So, the trick is to take all these qualities, weed out the strictly mom stuff and figure how to use the rest to attract women. In other words, if you pay attention to mom, and how she wants you to be - how she wants the world to see you, you can get a great idea of how to present yourself to other women (other women who, eventually, are going to have sons to whom they are going to teach these same qualities....jeez, it's like being able to read their minds.....almost cheating).

So, remember this, all women are moms in their hearts whether they have kids or not. So, give em what they want - be what they want - don't fight it.

What do they want? Well, simply put, they want a nice guy.

Don't be really cool. Really Cool is bad. You can be a little cool but don't make a point of it. Why, because really cool guys are only cool to themselves. Being really cool takes a lot of work and returns zip. Be aware of your environment and conform to it, and the people in it, but only to the point of being well accepted. If you're really cool you will be set apart from the main group - and that's where the girls are.

Be honest with people, especially girls. If you're caught in a lie it will get around and girls aren't comfortable with guys that they don't trust.

Never brag. If you have something that you think will be genuinely interesting to girls, go ahead and tell about it but tell it like you're sharing it with them - not to impress them. They'll be more impressed that way. Girls know when you're bragging and it bores them.

Never compete with girls. They don't like that. If you're playing, play with them, not against them. If you're discussing something, integrate what you're saying with what they are saying so that you don't come off knowing more than they do.

Respect  women. You don't have to go around being demonstrably respectful all the time, just have respect for them, things they do and say, how they feel about things, and they will know it - it will show naturally, you won't have to try. They really, really like that.

Hygiene - very important. If you or your clothes smell or are not clean, if your hands or fingernails are not clean, then don't even bother reading this. You lose. However - here's a strange one - many women are turned on by the smell of a man who has been working or playing hard - sweat, dirt and all - as long as its fresh and not left over from yesterday. Go figure. Anyway, don't worry about today's dirt and sweat from a noble endeavor, sports, job, etc. just make sure you start out clean, and when it's over, go get clean.

Gee, gosh, so far we're pretty much talking about how your mom raised you, aren't we? You didn't believe me, did you? Ok, now let's leave the "what mom taught you" stuff behind and get in to the sneaky stuff:

There are modes of dress that range from classic slob (jeans and T-shirt) to classic gentleman (suit and tie). If you normally dress as a classic slob, stop it. Even if every body else dresses as a classic slob and you want to fit in, stop it. Let's say that there's scale of 1 to 10 between slob and gentleman. If you are under the age of 25, always dress 2 points, and only 2 points, up from the average for your age group. 2 points is not a lot (hardly noticeable) and will not make you stand out from the crowd but it will create a slight difference between you the other guys who all look alike. The point here is to look a little older, wiser and more responsible to young women than the other guys. If you are over 25, dress 2 points down from the average for your age group. The point here is to look a little cuter to older women.

Do not make sudden movements or loud noises when you are around women. Compared to women, guys are big, strong and violent. Women are not afraid of you but are often uncomfortable around guys who invade their personal sphere with too commanding a presence. If you think about it, so are you. Be the "gentle giant."

People like you when you're interested in them. When you approach a group of people and you are deciding which one to talk to, you usually choose the one who is most interested in you and what you have to say. We all do that. Show and maintain a personal interest in all the women you know or meet - not just the ones you want to know better. Girls like guys that other girls like so make them all like you - it will snowball from there.

If you chew tobacco - close this thread and surf somewhere else - I can't help you.
Never spit around women. If you smoke, try not to do it around them unless they also smoke.
Don't cuss around them (at least not very much). Never tell downright dirty jokes around them (highly suggestive jokes are all right). Never say "f--k" around women even if it's acceptable in your crowd. You don't have to act all goody-goody all the time (actually, make sure you don't - that will kill you) but they will notice when you seem a cut above the rest respectwise.

Find a causual way, that fits your personality, to tell women that they look good or smell good. Do it often but in a way that doesn't make them think you're coming on to them. Just kinda like, "Hey, you look nice today," or, lean towards them, not too close, and say, "Ummm, smells good" then change the subject before they say anything. Make it a causual observation and quick statement of fact - not a personal thing, no big deal. That can make a girl who never thinks about you....think about you all day. They rarely hear those things from a man unless he's making a pass and since you're not its new to them and makes them think about you.

When talking to women, do so in such a way that you do not blow your breath in their face. Good breath - bad breath, doesn't matter, nobody likes it. If you notice that women seem to be avoiding you, check this first.

Never criticize others. Don't talk about others behind their back even if the people around you are. Be the guy who has a kind word for and about everybody. It gets around and women like guys they can count on to always be "on their side."

This isn't about meeting girls but keep it in mind anyway. Never become good friends with a girl you want to date before you start dating her. You're dead if you do. Nothing will ever happen.

The bottom line is this: Meet lots of girls. Know what they want, what they are attracted to. Don't be so cool that you drive them away. Be nice. Pay attention to them - all of them. Look good all the time. Be reasonably respectful. Don't be threatening or competive with them. Make sure they trust you. Make them feel safe around you. Share thoughts and feelings with them when you're talking. Let them choose subjects that they're interested in for discussion and most important of all - be around women as much as possible, lots of them. It's a numbers game - The more there are and the more they all like you, the better your chances of nailing one every now and then (so to speak).

Guys are easy. Whatever they say, just say, "Ok" and you'll be really popular - or - learn these sneaky secrets.

ATTRACTING MEN - written by a man - cause we know what we like

This is not about snaring that "special man." It's about attracting men in general. If you attract a lot of men then you should find that special guy somewhere among them. Attracting men is not hard. It doesn't take a whole book to tell you how - mostly common sense and a little cold, hard truth.

First, you should know a few things about us.

We like to drink beer, watch sports, go fishing, see things explode, watch large things collide, work on cars and get greasy, drive fast, go into the woods and shoot animals, sweat, burp, belch, fart, spit, yell, brag, strut, be loud, obnoxious, buy expensive toys we don't need and look at naked women, all of which are qualities that, since you want to attract us, you obviously admire. It's easy to see why you would want to attract us. As a matter of fact, I just farted. See, we're just plain cool.

So you don't have a pretty face, great legs and a nice butt? Still no problem. Just hang around us a lot, look available and act like a puppy. That works too. It also helps if you wiggle a lot.

Ok, not too serious so far but are you beginning to get the point? If you're female and you're there, we're attracted. We're simple that way so you have a pretty good head start. Your job is to cause us to be attracted to you specifically, no matter what you look like (within reason) but most importantly, on your terms.

Note the keywords: "On Your Terms."

As I said, we're pretty much attracted to anything that walks by so if you just want men to like you then you already know how to do that - just stand still and whenever a man asks you something, just say, "Ok." Bingo, you're the most popular girl in town. But, of course, that's not what you're looking for, is it?

So, let's define "terms." Since this is not an interactive site we will have to assume the following: you want men, in general, to see you as someone that they would like to meet, be around and perhaps ask out, based on your personal qualities which, incidentally, is exactly the same thing that men want.

Remember this, when we see you, we see a girl and we expect you to act like a girl, at least within reason - just like you expect us to act like a guy. If you find some of the following a little too "girly" for you, just refine it to fit your personality. Or, if you want to be today's modern "I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar" type, then their are other sites such as http://www.todaysempoweredwoman.crap written by women who have plenty of time to write since they, obviously, don't have a date tonight. Up to you.

OK. Here are the basics:
We like women who look happy. Not bubbling over and smiling ear-to-ear all the time, just reasonably happy with themselves and their environment. It makes them look pleasant and easy going so we're not afraid of them. That's right. We're scared as hell of you. A lot of what you read here is about you helping us get over our fear enough so we can act on our attraction to you.

Be nice, friendly, to all men, not just the ones you really like. Other men will see that and will see you as being approachable. Like you, we're intimidated by the opposite sex. If we know that you're the type of person who is receptive to others then we will be more likely to approach you, get to know you, and like you.

When you see a man you know, always acknowledge that he is around and that you noticed him - even if only a quick smile or wave - so that he, and other men, see that you are not aloof, again - approachable.

When you're talking with more than one man at a time, include all the men present in the conversation so that, in the future, each will know that they are able to get your attention as individuals and will seek it out. We all want attention. Again, the more men that find you approachable, the more to choose from.

I can't stress this enough. Remember, there will always be a lot of men who find you attractive but it's all about approachability. Even fabulously beautiful women may often find themselves lonely if they have an approachability problem so let all men see that you are approachable. The reason you want all men to see that is because you don't want them saying to themselves, "Well, she's approachable to some guys but maybe not me and I don't want to risk rejection." You might miss out on the perfect guy because of that.

Don't compete with us - you lose. You may win, but you lose. Games, sports, physical activities - that's fine, we even kinda like losing to you in those - but the general "anything you can do I can do better" attitude and you lose. We don't like guys who do that either but, unfortunately, many of us do.

Do you giggle occasionally? Go ahead. We like that. Not necessary but if you do - we think it's cute.

If you think something is really funny do you laugh uncontrollably without regard for what people think?....good for you - we do to.....as long as it's not a phony laugh.

We like it when women fuss over us a little - try walking by a guy you've never met before and just causally reach out and straighten his collar or something - don't say anything, just smile and keep walking. If you ever do meet him he will be your puppy......has something to do with mom, I guess.

Do you have a whole lot of class....dump it....unless you pull it off in a very feminine way, then it's all right. Having class is fine just be careful how much. It can be boring to others unless you can turn it off when not needed.

Dress Goth? Bye. - Got really long nails - yuk!
Dress with the crowd - but just a hair better. In other words, fit in but always look just a teeny bit better groomed and dressed that everybody else. Not too much, just a teeny bit. Oh, and be clean.

Never say, "F--K!" I don't care how accepted it has become, deep down, we don't like hearing women say it. Mom didn't say it and guess what, there's a hell of a lot of "mom" in what we like about women.

Never talk about how great some guy is. If you do, we'll all slink away somewhere cause we can never compete with how great some guy sounds when a woman is telling the story. Just don't talk about other guys at all, if you don't have to, because it makes us think that we might not be the only guy in the world that women should like - god forbid.

If you are around a group of men, or women, and are being ignored - get away from them. Never try to be the center of attention but don't let men see others ignore you. Every member of a group should have, at least, equal value. Don't allow other men to see you as a seemingly valueless member. File this away as "maintaining the appearance of popularity."

When talking to men, don't blow your breath towards them. You never know what it smells like. If you had a garlic coated onion for lunch and you blast them with it once, they'll think about it every time they're near you. Hard to live down. There are ways to talk, even close up, that won't cause this. Learn them.

Never tell downright dirty jokes - really suggestive jokes are Ok and kinda cute if you look slightly embarrassed when you tell them. If you're around a group that is telling dirty jokes, you can laugh but don't offer any of your own. But, don't put down the group for telling them. In other words, don't get all snotty on them.

"Men don't like intelligent women." Wrong! Very wrong. It seems like a lot of women believe that. Intelligent women are interesting, fun to talk to and sexy as hell. We all want one.

Better get this straight right now - we're instinctively attracted to women, in general, for purely mating reasons. After we get to know them, as individuals, it's a different story but keep in mind that this is the basic reason we are attracted to you. You may not like this and you may not believe it but that won't change it. If a guy tells you that it's not true...well...that's his way of telling you that he's different from other guys and you should like him best. Actually, you shouldn't like him best because he's a liar and you'll never be able to trust him.

So:

Go ahead. Wiggle that butt when you walk. Hell with what the other girls think. By god we love that butt wiggle. Damn it; let's see some leg. I mean, jeez, wear a dress once in a while. Sexist, you say? Hey, you asked! Hell, the President of the United States wants to see some leg...so does the Pope, so do I........in fact, send me a picture....(haha....just kidding). Don't flaunt yourself, that's trashy, but remember that we really, really like your body. Attract us with it and we'll get all caring, sensitive and appreciative of your other qualities later.

Don't sleep around, or rather, don't let it be known if you do. Actually, go ahead and screw your brains out if you want, just keep quiet about it. Each and every one of us want to nail you and think it's fine if you sleep with us but terrible if you sleep with someone else. That's right, we each think that every woman should be a virgin till we get our grubby hands on them - I know, we're stupid - double standard and all that - just don't mess around with the concept. It's an illusion we don't even understand ourselves. Once you have us safely and securely attracted, then you can tell us how dumb we are about it - but wait till then.

When you meet men, follow up. Go out of your way to be attentive the next time you see them. Hook them into your circle of men that are attracted to you. The more you've got, the more you'll get.

We like girls with long hair. We like short hair too but we really like long hair. Oh, what the hell, we just like girls with hair (as long as it is only on their head - and their... well... you know).

To sum up: just be nice. Be approachable. Let men see that you are approachable. Be clean. Dress decently. Pay attention to us individually. Don't act dumb. Be around guys as much as you can - the more that like you, the more to choose from. Work at it and you'll have a whole herd of men around you. You don't have to be a beauty, you just have to know some of the secrets and be willing to use them.

Good hunting.

A word to young girls. All this stuff will work just as well for you. But, and trust me on this, don't have sex till you're at least 17. Hey, go ahead and start building your herd of men - get a head start - just don't have sex with them. It will do you no good. I could write a book on all the complicated reasons why you shouldn't and, believe me, they're complicated. It won't make guys like you any better. It won't make you more popular. You will run a hell of a lot of risks. I know, I'm just an older person telling you to be good - well, that's not true - darlin, when you turn 18, look me up and I'll nail you myself but wait till you're at least 17 before you start with sex. Trust me, I don't lie to women.

hayyyy.......nakakatamad nmnang basahin ito...di ba pwedeng icompress sa pinakasempleng detalye... >

hayyyy......what did she say now then???  :tickedoff:

:2funny: :2funny: :2funny:...tanungin mo c mountzky

Is it not typical? No translation.  :'(

....kasi nga mag aral ka ng tagalog o kaya mas mganda ilocano ay kankanaey pala, para makaintindi ka rin...hehehe    :smitten:

gummy....  you  just  remimded me  long time ago in bco hehehe...... O0... ginawa  mo  na naman akong  interpreter  mo.... okay  lang....

Roald.... gummy  said,  she  can'T help  falling out  with  you.... for  your  simplicity  of  ideas.... they  were so uncomplicated..... they  are in detailed  that  it is  easy  for  her to grasp........ O0 :smitten:

Tnx for translating. I want to  :'( when I post and then i see a reply that I don't understand.
Falling out?? Would be happy if she fall in ... 
Anyway, I'll continue my Dating Advice.
:smitten:

The trick is gathering information to minimize the chances of getting shot down.

The following procedure is for men. It is for asking a girl out to dinner. Unless there is something basically wrong with you it is guaranteed to work.

(Before you act, read the section on "trouble-shooting" the dating procedure)

Step 1:
Arrange a face-to-face physical proximity with the woman.

Step 2:
Ensure that you will have her complete, undivided attention for at least 3 minutes.

Step 3:
Through preliminary conversation, surreptitiously establish a time frame between 6:00 PM and midnight on a specific day that she will not be envolved in any other activity and does not have to get up early the next day.

Step 4:
Ask, "Would you like to go out to dinner _________________?" (fill in the previously determined time frame)

Step 5:
If the response is positive, mutually determine the details of the assignation.

Step6:
Confirm all details not more than 12 hours before the event.


Troubleshooting Step 1:
Determine exactly why a face-to-face physical proximity with the woman cannot be established. Rearrange location, timing and mutual attitudes in such a way as to enable step 1 to function properly. Initiate Step 1. Proceed to Step 2.

Troubleshooting Step 2:
Ensure that no one else is within hearing distance. Ensure that you will not be interrupted during the procedure. Proceed to Step 3.

Troubleshooting Step 3:
Step 3 is designed to eliminate "time-specific" objections. Ensure that you have determined that she has nothing else to do during the required time frame. After acquiring the necessary information proceed to Step 4.

Troubleshooting Step 4:
Step 4 requires that the following aspects be true:

1. You are free to date.
2. She is free to date.
3. You have conquered your fear of rejection (just do it!).
4. You are not ugly as sin.
5. She has not, previously, rejected your advances.
6.There is not a basic, undisclosed, valid reason why you have not already asked her out.

If the above is true, initiate Step 4 and, if the results are positive (and they should be), proceed to Step 5.

Troubleshooting Step 5:
Step 5 requires that Step 4 resulted in a positive and definite response and must include the following:

1. A definite time for pickup or meeting.
2. A definite destination for the date.
3. A last re-affirmation of details.
4. The statement, "I'm really looking forward to it."

Troubleshooting Step 6:
This Step is very important. If you do not perform Step 6 she may think you have forgotten the date, thought better of it or don't think it's important enough to confirm. Women are funny that way.

If you have followed the procedures correctly and all of the requirements are met - you will definitely be having dinner with this woman in the near future.

Good luck and let me know how it works out.

This is a no-brainer but, being a girl, you probably want to know the sneaky ways of doing it.

The following suggestions make it easy to ask a boy, or man, out on a date without setting yourself up for that dreaded rejection.

(Before proceeding, make sure that both you, and the boy, are available for dating - that is, not involved with someone else)

Asking a boy/man out on a date depends, quite a lot, on how old you are and how old the boy is. If you are 12, or under, I suggest that you always have plenty of candy and playstation disks with you when you're around the boy. That is a great start and you may find that you won't have to ask him for a date because he will be hanging around all the time. But, no matter how old you are, the best, the all time easiest ways, to get a boy/man to go out with you are as follows.

First, through casual conversation, find out some things he likes to do. For instance, fishing (hey, ya gotta start somewhere) or skiing (snow or water) or car shows, computers, whatever. Anyway, some activity that he knows a lot about or is interested in. Then, in your own words and your own style, you say, "Hey, I wanna do that but I don't know how. Will you go with me and show me how? I wanna new computer but I don't know what to buy... could you sit down with me sometime and give me some hints... maybe we could grab some dinner and talk about it." Use your imagination.

There you go. If he wants to go out with you he will agree right away. You see, you haven't actually asked him to go out with you so if he says no then nobody is embarrassed - you just say,"Oh, well."

Another good one is, if you're talking and you find out he's going somewhere, just say, casually, "Hey, I wanna go too." In other words, create a date out of nothing.

Try, "I wanna go to (blah, blah) but I don't wanna go by myself. Ya wanna go with me?" Or - "My friends are going to ............ but they all have dates. Would you go with me?" Or - Simply and casually, "Hey, wanna go to ............ with me Friday night?"

Keep in mind that if you ask a guy out, don't ask them to do something that will cost them money, at least not on the first date. They may really want to go out with you but can't afford what you suggest and have to say no. If they enjoy being with you the first time they will ask you out the next time and will choose an activity they can afford.

When I was in the 10th grade, there was a girl named Anita in my school. I didn't know Anita personally but I was head over heels in love with her from afar. I was much too embarrassed to even try to meet her. I though my heart would break every time I saw her. 15 years later, I was having a beer in a night club in Stavanger, Norway. I was walking through the club when I heard someone say, "Roald?" I looked around and there, after all these years, was Anita and some guy sitting at a table. Well, I sat down with them, we talked for a while, and when the guy, her husband, went to the rest room, Anita told me that she had had a terrible crush on me when we were in school but was too embarrassed to try to meet me. We both had a big laugh but, from the look on her face and, I'm sure on mine, neither of us thought it was very funny. Don't let that happen to you. Remember, guys wanna date just like you. In all probability, he's sitting there wondering if he should ask Uncle Roald how to ask a girl for a date.....haha.

Incidentally, if you go out with some guy and have a boring time, it ain't gonna change. That's a fact. Don't go out with him again just to have someone to go out with. You will find yourself stuck in a boring relationship that may be hard to get out of.

Good luck and let me know how it works out

gummy really is falling inlove with you... 

Aiii... You think so? 
That would make my happy, but I'm not as sure as you are.
But you made me smile and I can asure you that I'm going to have sweet dreams tonight.  :-*

..... but Roald, what if I'm gay!

In the interest of accuracy, I asked a lot of gay people to help out with the subject of getting gay dates - they all said,  "fuck off" - except for one transvestite biker named Didi, who proved to be very knowledgeable on the subject. I couldn't find any lesbians who would cooperate so you girls are on your own - which doesn't matter since Didi says that most women are a wee bit "bi" anyway.

Didi says, the most important thing - is to make sure you are actually gay before going out to look for dates. Didi says, being with another guy, in bed, naked, on your knees - is not a good time to look over your shoulder and say, "You know what, I don't think I'm gay after all." It's rude and extremely disappointing to the guy behind you.

Didi says the following can help you determine if you are really gay:

·Â  Do you like Quiche?
·Â  Do you wear a fanny pack?
·Â  Have you ever said the word, "Moi?"
·Â  Do you carry a bottle of water around with you?
·Â  Do you wear tank tops after dark?
·Â  Do you change your underwear every single day?
·Â  Do you honestly think a man and a woman can be "just friends?"
·Â  Do you drive a pink cruiser?
·Â  Do you have a dog that requires professional grooming?
·Â  Do you put that blue colored stuff in your toilet?
·Â  Do you sip alcoholic drinks from a straw?
·Â  Do you like Kenny G?
·Â  No shit, do you really like Kenny G?
·Â  Do you have a cowboy hat but no cow?
·Â  Do you pay 50 bucks for a friggin cup of coffee at Starbucks?
·Â  Do you go around acting macho and calling people faggots, queers and screaming queens?

Didi says, if you do any one of the above, you're probably gay and are reasonably safe in pursuing your gayness.

Now that you have determined that you are actually gay, as opposed to just enjoying an occasional colonoscopy, you should log on to www.utopia-asia.com - everybody there is gay and finding dates is much simpler. However, even in Baguio there are some places that are not good for finding gay dates - like Lamaze classes, monster truck rallies, etc. Incidentaly, don't go rushing off to Holland... that "finger in the Dyke" story has absolutely nothing to do with the subject.

Actually, truth be told, there is no "Didi, the transvestite biker" and I don't have a clue as to how to go about getting a gay date... unless... well, ...you might try hanging around the showers at the health club... but, good luck anyway.

P.S.
[i]If you are gay and would, seriously, like to offer some, humorous but helpful, dating advice to others (since I, being very wise in every other way, is a little untutored on this subject), make a new thread.[/i]

yea  especially  now  that  she  will be reading  your  simpified  post here....

:o :o :-[ :-X....hahaha...translator ka nga ba mountzky? :knuppel:


....hey aimz i've fallen already ok.... :smitten: >

you  picked  me  to be  your  translator  pren  right..... :knuppel: :knuppel:

....hahaha...sabi ko nga.... :-X